Sleep is a Fragile Thing

 For the last few days Peter has reverted to old habits.   He's been waking up many, many times at night and screaming for 30-45 minutes.  I can't calm him down.  He thrashes in his bed and slaps my hands away.  I've tried feeding him, holding him, and just leaving him in bed and stroking him, but nothing seems to work any better than anything else.  He just screams until he doesn't, without apparent reason.  Then minutes or hours later, he does it again.  About 5 times every night.  As a result, I'm exhausted and so is he.  This is the view of him I get most of the day now.

There are many times during the day when I have to help one of the other kids with school work or technical difficulties and when that happens, Peter does this.  Not sleeping at night has affected his daytime sleep too. Yesterday he fell asleep in the car as I drove a friend to the doctor and even though he only slept 10 minutes before we arrived and I had to get him out, he refused to nap that afternoon and was so over-tired at bedtime that he cried for an hour before finally going to sleep. 

I'm really hoping this is just a phase he's going through.  I thought the days of such sleepless nights were behind me, but I can see that they are cyclical.  It's really hard to feel so torn between two important things - help with school, care for baby.  Thankfully, the kids often help take care of him when I'm helping one of the others.  I think it's mostly because they hate the sound of his crying and will do anything to get him to stop, but I'll take whatever motivation leads to the desired action.  

We'll see how things go next week.  The schools are reopening and so the older three will be going back to in person schooling.  That means no kids at home to take my attention, but also no siblings to play with and entertain him.  We'll see if it's a positive thing for Peter overall.  I know for me, I'm sad to see them go.  I have really enjoyed having them home during the day.  I wish I could just keep them home, but I know that's not what's best for them.  Socializing with friends is important and I'm glad they'll have the chance.  I hope that everything goes smoothly and no one gets sick.