Tuesday, October 08, 2024

The New Normal

With the school year in full swing, Benjamin gone, Kelly in a new job at Ford as Associate Director of Capital Strategy, and me teaching early morning seminary, we are slowly finding a new rhythm.  Benjamin seems to be doing the best of all.  Every week we get happy emails, photos, and some really great calls.  We are so proud of him.








He is having eating contests (who can eat the most tacos/ice cream bars/etc) during down time, but mostly he's staying quite busy and learning a lot.  He has been made zone leader and even willingly got another hair cut!  He's definitely growing and changing.  When we talked on the phone he even spoke some Spanish with me which was so fun to hear.

I think about him all the time but I no longer get weepy...actually that's not true.  One time I cried - when I attended the school district's marching band showcase.  The showcase is where all three local high schools come together to perform.  For the last four years Benjamin was right there in the middle - tall, blonde, with his giant drum, and even bigger smile, leading the cadences, keeping the beat.  He was never happier than when he was performing in marching band.  Unless he was playing video games. :) This year, it was his friend Evan.  It was Evan's name that was announced as drumline captain and Evan that led the band in cadences.  Nowhere was my handsome boy in his red uniform.  I couldn't help crying a little.  It just seemed so wrong.  I just kept reminding myself that Benjamin was doing something infinitely better.

Bella and Christian were in the showcase this year, which was wonderful.  Bella always looks so good out there.  She's got the perfect posture, perfect marching steps.  She really stands out.  I was so happy Christian could join too because the high schools invited all the 8th grade band students to join them for the national anthem.




Peter is slowly adjusting to being in school.  He only goes Tues and Thurs and that's already way too much he says.  I really wish he'd enjoy other kids more.  We are struggling to get him to make friends and socialize.  He is just absolutely opposed to talking to or playing with others.  Whether at the library, the play ground, swim class, or school, when there are other kids, he becomes supremely uncomfortable. We have been working on just smiling and saying hello when greeted.  I tell him you don't have to play with everyone, but just smile and say hello.  Baby steps.  He's trying.  The other day a 17 year old girl told me she smiled and said hello to him in the hallway at church and he awkwardly smiled back.  She said it made her day. :)

I took him to the cider mill/apple orchard last week.  It's an amazing place with all sorts of things to see and do, but it was also very crowded.  He was miserable.  I couldn't get him to do anything he'd been excited to do before arriving, because of the other kids.  Only when he could manage to do something all alone was he finally at ease.  He went home declaring it had been a terrible day.  Alas, buddy, the world is full of people.  You're going to have to get used to it.  




Bella and I did another service project together last week.  We worked with a group called Life Remodeled that transforms neighborhoods here in Detroit.  They spearheaded an effort they called their "6 Day Project" where thousands came every day and removed blight through various activities, predominately yard work.  We came on the last day and helped clean up and winterize everything that was used.  Bella and I worked for hours doing this and she was a champ - never complaining or standing idle.  Just kept moving and working.  My job was to drain the gasoline from 350 lawn mowers.  What a job! When we had 6 mowers left, my partner, Dave, decided to go get a bagel!  I couldn't believe it.  We'd done hundreds and he stopped with 6 left!  So I did the last 6 and when I was on the very last one, another volunteer came over and said, "I'm going to take a picture of you working so hard and Dave just standing around eating a bagel!" 


I thought it was very funny.  Dave was a good sport about it too.  He happily jumped into the picture.  He's actually a very hard working guy.  He's been at several of the projects Bella and I have done together this past year and we secretly call him "Chainsaw Dave" because that's what he uses most when he gets a chance.  It was nice talking to him when there was no chainsaw blaring.  I've really enjoyed getting to know all the people in these various service projects Bella and I do.

A tradition at Kelly's work is that when you sign your last deal, you get to wear the Golden Jacket.  He sent me this picture last week on his last day at his old job.  A surprisingly emotional day.  This job came 5 years ago the same week as he was called to be bishop.  It was a job that has taught him a ton and also was the absolutely perfect job for a bishop - lots of flexibility.  And just as its time to be released from his responsibility as bishop, he is also switching out of that job.  There are no coincidences.  God was in this from the beginning and knew just what he needed.  We have been so blessed.




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